–Quote for title is from The Flower Sisters, by Michelle Collins Anderson
Even in the darkest times, the stars will shine in the night skies, and bring hope to those who look up. Darkness can be calming, or it can become a nightmare. It’s how you interact with it that makes your life better or worse. If you can embrace your life as it is, knowing that the sun will, indeed, come up tomorrow, you can live in your own skin. You can accept that there will always be dark times, but hope does spring eternal, and we can look forward to another day of living.

Today was a reflection day of where we are going and why the turmoil is making us frazzled human beings. A co-worker died just a few days ago and it was a shock to my system. He was younger than me, and seemed in good health. Although we didn’t know each other well, we shared funny jokes and silliness. We had just said “Hey” to each other a few days ago and didn’t think anything of it. Sometimes I feel I am lucky that I haven’t gotten there yet, aches and pains and all. And sometimes I wonder what it will be like when my time comes. Will there be an afterlife? Will I come back? Answers that are beyond me at this point even though I ponder it. I hope for a very long life and sharing knowledge and love every day that I am given on this planet. I hope this co-worker found peace and happiness wherever and whenever he is in this time-space continuum. In Anderson’s book, The Flower Sisters, the grandmother was an undertaker for her small town, and had this to say when receiving a body and regarding death: “No one is special; no one is spared. It is a concept that is both infuriating and comforting, depending on my mood….”

As we age, we all think of ourselves as that eighteen-year-old kid who was bright-eyed and prepared for anything: going off to college, or trade school, traveling the world, or to fight in a  war. And we fled our homes in hopes that our lives would have meaning and we would make a difference in the world. We wanted to change who we were. We wanted to be different from our parents and ancestors. Yet, we understood that we couldn’t change where or who we’d come from, but those old places we lived, depending on the history, the good and the bad feelings, would stay with us throughout our lives. Many of us decided to stay close to home, and live our lives, in close proximity to our families and on our ancestors’ lands. But many of us ventured out into the world and tried to become someone else. The memories and heritage would always stay with us, but some of us knew that we wanted to create a different community and raise our families with those who were more likely to embrace a future that would be better for all.

Hopefully, we all found our place in the world, and our stories mingled with those new people in our lives. Hopefully, we were able to reconcile where we came from and where we were headed: towards a different future.

There will always be those heritage memories and some of us are able to reconcile our past with our current states. Some of us write about these memories to help us have a heart that is full but also open to new adventures and live a life that is full of love.

It’s hard to think of yourself as aging and needing help in the future. It’s hard to talk about parents that are gone, or aren’t aging as well as you are. But, we have to take care of our past, and our elders and pass on this sense of duty to our children.

My hope is that when we need help, our child will understand that it’s okay to help us take care of ourselves. We don’t want to become elders, yet it is going to happen. My questions for tonight are: “Why is this such a hard concept to those in power? Why is our country diminishing those in need right now?” Is it because they are afraid to get old? Don’t they understand that no amount of money will buy you out of your ending? It will happen when it happens.

I am taking this opportunity to tell the world this: Take care of yourself, but also take care of your elders. It’s okay if they weren’t the greatest parents and grandparents to you. They did the best they could. And I would like to tell the people in power: Take a moment to reflect before you cut services to those in need.

I love you all, and hope you can wrap your arms around those you hold dear. Hold them close as long as you can.