I finally got back to Michelle Obama’s book The Light We Carry and wanted to share a few thoughts with you. In the beginning of the book, she talked about her time on the presidential campaign with her husband Barack. She talked about the four words that plague even the most powerful people she knew. And those words were: “Am I good enough?” Her answer was “I don’t know.” The interesting part about this dialogue is that when she took it to Barack, “…he helped me (her) remember that anxiety was a natural part of doing something new and big….”

She recognized how the previous years leading up to the 2020 election had left people “wobbly”- unsettled, watchful, less connected, and anxious about the future. This is the gist of what we are feeling today; that we have no control over what is to come, and the hatemongering has spread to anyone who doesn’t tow the party line. Currently, equilibrium isn’t possible, but we can evolve individually if we stop asking when this will end. Instead, we must ask: How can we adapt to create a space we can live in and with until we make it better by educating the people who don’t understand what they’ve done? If I believe that nothing can be fixed, and take the “why bother” attitude, I will go down a dark hole and never come out.

Mrs. Obama’s analogy about knitting hit home to me. If I start the doom and catastrophe thought loop, I can at least put on some music and knit. It is the small stuff that will get me through the big stuff. The little projects and actions make my brain say: “I’ve got this!” Just remember, it still takes time to change even the little stuff.

In Chapter 7 of the book, Michelle Obama listed and detailed the points her mother gave her regarding how to create the best in their children. I encourage you to read this chapter carefully so you can help create a better environment for your child or grandchild to grow up in.

1.         “Teach your kids to wake themselves up.”

2.         “It isn’t about you. Good parents are always working to put themselves out of business.” (emphasis mine)

3.         “Know what’s truly precious.”

4.         “Parent the child you’ve got.” (Not someone you want them to be-interpretation mine)

5.         “Come home. We will always like you here.”

There will always be people in the world who think they are more powerful when they belittle and make people feel unwelcome. By breaking down people into the have and have nots, the “have” people feel superior. If we do not challenge the old narratives, we will internalize our unworthiness as the truth. If they put you down, all you must do is: “Don’t Listen.”

There is so much more to read in this book that may help you sort out the world into a livable place. I know I haven’t done justice to the book, so I encourage you to read it today!

You are all wonderful people. You just forget about that sometimes. Be happy and love yourself for who you are today.