When did people stop listening to each other?

What do you do when someone stops you in mid-sentence, dismisses anything you say as Fake News and immediately start espousing their beliefs that they heard through their friends? When you try to tell them how thoroughly you have researched your topic you are speaking about, they say they don’t want to talk about it and then continue to talk over you, attacking you for what you know because it doesn’t fit with their beliefs? Also, why do others want you to believe what they believe? Are they afraid of looking within themselves and finding out that they are wrong and do not want to open their minds to reality? Why do others have the right to say what is right for all others, and especially women?

Everyone has the right to have opinions, but opinions based on lies and male-dominated religious beliefs and classic 1950s sitcoms should not affect everyone else. Whether we have a law passed or not, whether others’ religion puts down women, should not be the basis to oppress all women and put us back into the past. Stop being silly!

This is the beginning of a new era. Your high school graduation has arrived. You have had an amazing journey since the beginning. Your education journey took you from Pre-School, which was: Twoodles, Building Blocks and Stepping Stones, and onto Coal Creek Elementary, Louisville Middle School and finally to Monarch High School (MOHI) and the adventure was worthwhile.

COVID, insurrection, devastating weather and fires, and threat of war were all obstacles you had to overcome, and yet you persevered. The learning process has filled you with hope for a better future, and the desire to make the world a better place.

You met a multitude of fantastic people and teachers along the way, with Legos galore, Robotics, TSA competitions, and a fantastic trip with the band and choir to New York City on Spring Break! Your learning excelled, creating who you are today, a person prepared for higher learning. Marching band competitions created a sense of belonging to something bigger than an electronic world. My gift to you is communications skills. You can communicate with anyone, any age, any size, any race and any gender, and your ability to maintain multiple different and dynamic groups of friends. Your Dad’s gift to you is your ability to understand the inner workings and processes of a computer. Lifetime friendships will remain in the future for you. College will help you continue to grow, and you will make another group of friends, while holding the ones you already have close to you and in your heart forever.

With “Buzz Lightyear” on your side, you are ready to advance to “Infinity and Beyond.” You will achieve greatness once you apply yourself to your finest endeavor. You will fight the good fight and win the battles that are important. And all the while we will stand by you and support you.

Seniors, you all went through heartbreak and tragedy these past few years and still excelled, despite all the tragedy – it was more than us parents went through in our entire lives.

Be grateful for a world that embraces you and allows you to change things that need changing.

Love your parents and family no matter what happens in the future.

Love your life and reach out to others who need your help and embrace them.

“Learn as if you will live forever, live like you will die tomorrow.” – Mahatma Gandhi

“Success usually comes to those who are too busy looking for it.” – Henry David Thoreau

“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” – Carl Sagan

“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” – Nelson Mandela

AND…. “Overthrow selfishness and replace it with kindness.” – Dru Tieben

Dear Graduating Seniors:

There was a golden rule centuries before religious conquest and political dogma took over the world. Simply put, the Rede stated: “An it harm none, do what ye will.” This thought helped create an ancient mythology that those who lived close to the land didn’t harm the people or their surroundings because they knew what was needed to survive. The community cooperated and created an environment where everyone contributed and reaped the same rewards. Our ancient ancestors were smarter than what we believe of them. Sure, they didn’t have electronic communication, but somehow, they communicated with each other, got along, and survived, at least until the next hoard came along to take over. I would like to believe that they didn’t destroy everything for simple political gain and support to be re-elected. I would like to believe they were more accepting of each other and didn’t try to stop conversations because another tribe believed something different. Of course, there were wars for territory and property, just as it is currently, but once the dust settled, perhaps our ancestors listened to each other a little more and adapted innovative ideas that helped them survive. Perhaps the conquerors worked in harmony with the conquered and created a better society as a whole and accepted each other.

However, when the ruling class kept the spoils for themselves and enslaved others, classism began, and the ruling class engaged in both physical and mental wars to lord over the peasants, using thoughts and religious fervor as weapons. The psychological divide and conquer games became the new normal, and the world changed. There were no common goals. No one was safe. Ultimate power over others at the expense of life became the new normal. Money was the new religion. New regimes convinced people that ruling class ideas were much better and were the correct way of thinking, at the expense of free thought. Oppression became yet another new normal. People began to isolate in their communities, convincing themselves that they were staying out of it, and lived their lives in  a bubble, ignoring the next onslaught, sometimes at a great price. Civilizations shrank and grew, depending on the conquerors, and no one listened to each other. Fear dominated the world. No one spoke up or fought back, pretending that this was what was expected of them.

Today, the cycle has returned to divide and conquer. Those who have the most power and resources want to keep them at the expense of both the land and the people who make up the rest of the population. It is more important to be a powerful multi-billion-dollar corporation at the expense of everything else. Wordplay to get increasing media exposure is now vital for the ruling class to get people listening which will sway all others towards their belief systems. People are listening, but they are not responding. And, if they do respond, it is in anger, causing others to spiral downward into anger and depression. A vast majority feel that there is nothing they can do to make the world a better place.

Dissemination of misinformation has ruled the world, and the people with the most money and power are currently reigning supreme, having conveyed so many conspiracy theories as factual. The general population accepts these ridiculous ideas, because deep down there is something inside them that makes them afraid of the truth. Deep down, people know that they need to research for the facts in a context that is not biased. Unfortunately, good research takes time and thought so many will not always make the right choices. People want to believe what is told to them because the truth makes them uncomfortable. Physical and mental violence are becoming an accepted practice. If someone doesn’t want to have a dialogue that might change their minds, they get angry and lash out. Everyone is angry at each other all the time and it is exhausting! Discourse has left the playing field. No one is listening to diverse point of views without getting angry. Everyone is taking a side and not coming to any compromise. There is no middle ground. Uncomfortable conversations have become the quest to make changes in the world.

However, having said all of that, I acknowledge that there are so many injustices that have happened in our generation, but that does not mean we can’t move forward. My advice to all of you is simply this: 

Don’t disseminate misinformation even if you think it is a joke and your generation finds the humor in it. A vast majority of people want to believe in conspiracy theories. People will believe anything when they are afraid of change. Know in your hearts that these conspiracy theories on the internet aren’t real. Know that:

We all need to take personal responsibility for our actions and strive for goodness, not hate. Don’t hurt others in both thoughts and actions. Those who hurt others with their voices need to look inside and see why they do what they do and why it is important to them to point out others’ frailties and faults. Listening is a hard life skill to learn, but it will be the best tool in your toolbox. Go out there and make a difference. Make everyone’s life, including yours, a little better each day. You have an exceptionally large burden on your shoulders to make changes that will affect everyone’s futures. Reach deep into your hearts and go out in the world and make it better. Don’t blame the elders, just shake off any old hurts and slights and become a better elder. With higher learning and working to uncorrupt the system from within its very walls, you will help us all survive for another millennia. Remember that your parents may not always agree with you or your friends, but they do have a few answers for you if you ask them. You can believe in them if they are on a right and just path. They really do believe in you and will support you no matter how weird you think they are in their behaviors, thoughts, and actions. Be the calm person in the dialogue and just listen.

So, get going Seniors! Make things happen. Make changes. Remember the basics you’ve learned throughout your lifetime. Be kind, be beautiful, be fair, don’t spread mean rumors, and pick up the trash! (Don’t send photos of what you found on the ground in disgust of what others left behind. Just pick it up no matter who did it.) Have the respect to make your life and your neighborhood a beautiful place to live.

Congratulations Class of 2022!

I gathered up my slightly used winter clothing, shoes, socks, and other paraphernalia, packed it all up and took it to the ARC Thrift Store. After having been turned down by the stores giving away items for the Marshall Fire because they were overwhelmed with new clothing donations, they turned me away. They did not want any used stuff. It was nice to know how generous people were to help the victims, but I felt a little rejected. Therefore, I went back to ARC, where I always go, to help in the way that I could.

I made a list of what I had to donate. I had filled two large plastic storage containers by the time I completed my task, sorting through everything. There were coats, shoes, purses, women’s business clothing, and finally two grocery bags filled with thirty-seven (37) pairs of socks that I had recently collected. 37 pairs…. I began to wonder why I had so many socks. My sock drawer had turned into two overflowing sock drawers. Therefore, I knew it was time to purge. I sorted the socks out and identified what I really needed to keep. I threw away the ones that had seen better days or was missing a mate, disappearing into the dryer dimension, never to be seen again. In the end, I produced 37 pairs to give away. It made me think about my shopping habits and continued search for the most comfortable and perfect sock.

I posed these questions: Why do I continue to buy? Am I hoping my purchases will help me achieve perfection? While some people might have an endless pursuit for the perfect bag, or the perfect pair of shoes, my search continues to be one of comfort for my poor feet. Years of abuse such as cramming feet into poorly designed shoes and ever poorer designed socks have wreaked havoc on them. Age has determined my fate. I am forever searching for that perfect fit and creature comfort – no pinched toes in shoes (wide sizes only!) and no ridged seams in socks (brands that are soft and seamless!). This makes me wonder why production of these ill-fitting items has not changed. Why do we as consumers continue to buy them? Why don’t we complain to the companies when they don’t feel comfortable? But, that is a blog post for another time.

If my house and my closet is still the same size, why do I keep all this stuff? I don’t want to take a bedroom and turn it into a closet like what we see on those home makeover shows. Therefore, I needed to re-evaluate my purchasing decisions and be comfortable with less, only choosing what clothing works for my body. Clutter can do us in, whether it is physical or mental. Throwing out items or thoughts that do us harm is satisfying to our mental health.

Striving for perfection is a noble goal, and we should continue as a society to do so in every endeavor. Yet, when we become obsessed with that goal, or that goal harms others, it is time to take a step back from the frenzy, be thankful and satisfied with what we have today. We can choose clothing (or causes) that are worthy of the expense – in both time and money. We can give away so much more, albeit slightly used, to others which will help them along their paths. It is time to strive for a better outcome and getting rid of emotional attachment to all things less important. It is time to step up and say it will be okay if we do the right thing through our thoughts and actions. It is time to give up on old ideas, stop fretting about the small stuff and give it away. When we can commit to positive action, we can be satisfied with our lives (and our belongings). Overall, we are better human beings for always doing the right thing. Welcome to Spring!