Hallmark Moments

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AND: Love, Romance, and Aging Brains
Have you ever found yourself watching the Hallmark Channel around the holidays and getting sucked into the story, even if it is really bad, full of cliches, and with a festive atmosphere where no one is angry with each other? And a little part of you is starting to want to have that life, that moment after the big fight where you kiss and make up, near the mistletoe, and everything is wonderful, and everything is with your soul mate?

Wellllllll…. We all know this quest for true love and romance doesn’t always happen in real life, right? We all go through the ups and downs of daily life, and as we age, things get harder to face in the real world. (Also, notice that everyone in all of these movies is beautiful, has money, and is very young?)

What I’m trying to say is this: We create our Hallmark moments every day that we interact with the ones we love. We strive for perfection, yet embrace what is given. We can love each other the way we are, not perfect, yet make our dreams come true with what we have. Love can conquer our greatest fears as long as we acknowledge our past and move on to a future of our own creation.

In the movie Fred Claus, Fred, Santa Claus’s brother, realizes that there are no naughty kids and that every kid deserves a present at Christmas, no matter how small. It’s the thought of having a loving family surrounding them that counts, not the present itself. In the real world, not every kid is always good, and not every kid gets a present, or even has a family. There are so many of us who forget about the love portion, no matter what we do.

There are rich spoiled kids with good and bad parents, and poor kids whose parents treat them poorly, or kids who don’t have parents at all and are in the system. But I’d like to believe that the majority of parents pull together for the holidays in ways that aren’t about how they were treated by their own parents. I’d like to believe in those happy moments where families just love each other for who they are in this present moment. Sometimes it’s hard to get beyond our weird family dynamics, but there is hope for all of us to love each other in ways we weren’t loved. There is hope that we can become better parents and grandparents and forgive those who treated us poorly in the past. There is hope in seeing others not as different or less than us, but as part of our bigger family, part of being human, people we should embrace and call our own.

So sometimes I have weird dreams, and my family dynamic from the past interferes with my aging brain’s headspace. But I try to overcome these moments and say a little mantra, forgiving all the past trespasses of my family or me against my family. I try to see where I’m at today and be thankful for my loved ones who love me unconditionally. I try to love them the same way that I want to be loved. I remember the good times and try not to beat myself up with the bad times. It’s hard to forget everything, but my brain and body have lived for a long time on this planet, and I hope it continues to live a little longer to see a change in our world for the better.

All I know is that I have done what I could to help others and will continue to do so through many, many small acts of kindness. I hope you’ll do the same. But I think most of us can be better than you know who, and, at least when I fall asleep in my chair, I don’t have the world watching me because I am in charge of the highest office in the land. Time to step down and become a human being, mister! And threatening people’s lives is not cool, so stop it and overcome your pettiness and selfishness. Be a kind and gentle leader for once in your life! No amount of gold on the walls will make you happy with who you are if you don’t take care of all of the people in this country. Enough said.

I hope everyone has a happy and peaceful Thanksgiving. Make beautiful food, share it, and continue your traditions, as well as make new ones for the future. Overcome your dark moods before everyone comes home and try to stay in the moment. Love each other the best way you know how, and extend a helping hand to others in need. I send out much love to all this week!

Traditions

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I have just started preparing for the holidays. My neighbor has all the lights up around his house and is working on the inside! Wow! We will probably start doing that this weekend. We always miss the good weather and end up doing it in the snow. Crazy us.

We’ll get down all of the boxes and boxes of lights and ornaments that are up in the attic over the garage, and I will get out my Lego Village and put it on a long folding table upstairs for display. (We bought the Lego Christmas train this year to add to the village!)

We won’t build the Lego set or put up the tree until kiddo gets home from college, another tradition we’ve started over the last few years. Everyone takes turns putting all the decorations and ornaments on the tree, and if you know me, I will rearrange them a million times before it looks just right.

It’s fun to create traditions that are your own. My husband’s mom passed away recently, and I remember her kindness and thoughtfulness to me when I was struggling with a piece of writing. She would always review my books, and they were always honest and still positive. One of her traditions she started was sending us a Hallmark Christmas ornament around Thanksgiving each year.

We sometimes got the tree up early, but usually it was about two weeks before Christmas. When kiddo came into our lives, David’s mom started sending fun kid ornaments. We have a whole box of them now, and we only put up a few of them for sentimental reasons. This is the first holiday season we will be without her, so I decided to keep the tradition going. I bought a Hallmark ornament for us and for my husband’s Dad. He received it last week, and I think it cheered him up a little bit. I will try to honor her in the future in a way I hope has meaning for all.

And we always hope for a dusting of snow like in the movies, but of course, we haven’t had any snow or rain in 233 days now, so who knows? We can wish. I love you all this week before the holiday season starts. And remember those in need through Colorado Gives Day on December 9th!  https://www.coloradogives.org/

And, of course, catch up on my series before the new ones go live:
SHOP Drusilla Tieben on Amazon

People Who Shouldn’t Be In Charge

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People who do outrageous and horrendous acts against others who are different should not work for the government. On November 10th, the Supreme Court rejected the bid to overturn the landmark same-sex marriage decision. A ridiculous woman who worked for a County Clerk’s office in Kentucky kept denying marriage licenses to same sex couples because of her religious beliefs. Tell me that is not JUST PLAIN WRONG! Why can’t people understand about separation of church and state? Why are they imposing their beliefs on others? I don’t do that. Why do others think they should? I am glad one couple stood up to her and made her pay for her wrongdoing. I have no sympathy for that worker.

As a woman who was in government for many, many years, I am so disappointed in those petty folks who want to have power over others, regardless of who they hurt. Women should unite and understand that whatever they believe in their private lives should not be pushed onto others. If you are a government worker of any kind, you should do your job well and serve those who come to you. You have to be brave enough to do the right thing by others, regardless of who you are in your personal life. You CHOSE to work to help all the people in your city, county, state, or federal workplace. You were ELECTED to serve everyone. Don’t be a hater. Enough said.

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11/12/25

When Will You Stop Believing the Lie?

Everyone should have the opportunity to eat a meal and be able to survive. Every child should never go hungry.
Every PERSON, whether adult or child, should have the opportunity to receive an education.

If you make a billion dollars, you should pay your fair share in taxes to support programs for ALL OF US, just like the rest of us.
If you make a million dollars, you should pay your fair share in taxes to support programs for ALL OF US, just like the rest of us.
The middle class should NOT have to bear the burden, but we do it, because IT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO.

In Reese Witherspoon and Harlan Coben’s book, Gone Before Goodbye, the protagonist encounters many of the richest people in the world in Dubai. Her comments about them hit home:
–“Dubai is a playground for the rich and their most hedonistic urges. It’s Disney World for grown-ups who don’t want to be grown-ups. It wants to be salacious and gritty, but it is hard to blend that with the baser need to be safe and comfortable.” [Coben, Harlan; Witherspoon, Reese. Gone Before Goodbye (p. 197). Grand Central Publishing. Kindle Edition.]
–“…no one looks happy the day after. It all feels a tad desperate and sad. These people are rich and successful and powerful and have everything, but it isn’t enough. That’s the problem. It is never enough. Human nature sees to that. We get used to every luxury. Even the richest men in the world, we’ve seen over the past few years, can’t be satiated, no matter how much money or power or yachts or women or offspring or hero worship or attention or whatever they have….” She also quoted from Bruce Springsteen: “…the poor man wants to be rich, the rich man wants to be king, and the king ain’t satisfied until he rules everything.” [Coben, Harlan; Witherspoon, Reese. Gone Before Goodbye (p. 198). Grand Central Publishing. Kindle Edition.]

People who feel cheated by this administration believe in THE BIG LIE. Powerful people need to keep the little guy on edge, and it angers everyone who feels they are being taken advantage of by others, even when those others are suffering. They feel a need to hold onto what they have and forget about everyone else. Well, I think that everyone should pay their fair share. Why do we still believe it? Why don’t we care about each other, no matter who we are and how we got here?

And why is it so important to be in that uber-rich class high above the rest of us? Why do we hold onto all the money we have and not share it with the rest of the world? People like those oligarchs just want more money, more status, more of everything. And yet they aren’t very happy at the end of the day. Money did not buy happiness after all for them. Apparently, power is more important than people in this world. And yet, rich people continue to buy their happiness by purchasing others’ support. Is this because they need to control the world? It’s sad for me to think that this is the way the world works.

So, I am putting it out to the Universe to keep reading, keep giving, and enjoy the moments you have on earth. Take a breath and enjoy the week. We can only do what we can. Anxiety might be high right now, but we can help each other no matter what. Sometimes we need to shift our spiraling thoughts and go out and join others in the spectacular Northern Lights’ display. It can humble us to realize how small we truly are in the universe we inhabit.

I love you all on this cloudy day. I am hoping for rain!

When Disagreeing Was a Good Thing

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Remember those days—when we all had differing viewpoints that were welcomed in the conversation? Remember when we could challenge each other and engage in thoughtful discussions, relishing the conversation? Remember when we weren’t so angry, and we continued to listen without interrupting the speaker? When did this change?

I am reading Reese Witherspoon and Harlan Coben’s new book, “Gone Before Goodbye.”  I am not normally a Harlan Coben fan, but I am intrigued by his writing now that he has collaborated with another author on a promising story. Initially, the protagonist attempts to come to terms with her loss and downfall, reflecting on her past. She spoke of her student days, when they would go out drinking after a particularly hard day, and engage in philosophical discussions at the bar (Remember that?) Nostalgia of those college days and early career days brings back memories of when we knew we were so right about everything. In the book, the protagonist stated: “What do you call a longing for critical thinking and common sense and decency?” [Coben, Harlan; Witherspoon, Reese. Gone Before Goodbye (p. 24). Grand Central Publishing. Kindle Edition.]

As we age, some of us become comfortable and even complacent about the world around us. We don’t listen to others without getting offended over some ridiculous idea. We don’t laugh as often. We often become frustrated with the legal system. “…if you think our legal system is about truth or fairness or equality, you’re either not paying attention or delusional.” [Coben, Harlan; Witherspoon, Reese. Gone Before Goodbye (p. 28). Grand Central Publishing. Kindle Edition.] This quote resonated with me because I still want to believe in a fair and just process. It’s not always there, but I still want to believe, and I continue to pay attention to what is going on in the government, as well as the daily craziness.

But sometimes people of every age just get that glazed look in their eyes when someone tries to convince them they are right, even though their thoughts and actions are really wrong. Discourse turns into a shouting match, and anger ensues. It’s hard to say you are wrong about something. No wonder we are tired. Current events and life as we know it have worn us down, yet we continue to try to keep going. And sometimes, it is just frustrating when a younger person ignores you because they have had bad experiences in their lives dealing with their senior relatives.

But today I am asking millennials, Gen Zs, and Gen Alphas to not lump all of us seniors with the grandparents and parents of the pandemic, who you still cannot talk to because they were so vengeful and hateful (Please take a moment to listen. We really do have some good things to say and do with the rest of our lives.) Sometimes you just have to forgive your relatives for their behaviors and thoughts and move on. Sometimes, you just have to let it all go, even if it means putting off conversations about serious subjects for now. Love them however you can before it’s too late.

Not all of us seniors are bad people or hateful. We still have our faculties, and are those free thinkers that you think your generation invented. There are so many of us who are still trying. We just don’t want to be ignored or become invisible because you think we don’t know anything, or are those angry seniors they portray on the news to get viewers to watch. I have made a promise to my kiddo and the new generations to always take a moment to listen and take on their causes, continuing to write about it and showing respect for everyone, regardless of who they are or what they represent. I give to worthy causes and love all human beings. I ask you all to do the same. Something to think about.

On this cold and dry night beyond the 100th meridian, I am thinking of all of you and sending out this message of hope. I love you all.

Thoughtful Friday

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I recently discovered some of Doug Peacock‘s books, which are truly insightful in these challenging times. He was probably Edward Abbey’s best friend and was the inspiration for Hayduke. He is still fighting for the land, the animals, and the indigenous people all over the world. I would have loved to have that part of his life. He has traveled the globe studying and writing about things we forget about and are destroying. He has a large group of like-minded friends who have championed the cause to save the earth and its plants and animals. For example, he traveled with Tom Brokaw, who was his neighbor!He recently published stories from his life travels, and so many of them hit a home run. I encourage you to read this book!

From the book Was it Worth it? From the 2020 pandemic:
“The current pandemic will not be our last plague and it is a prime symptom that our center is not holding. Our smug assumptions of the primacy of our civilization are coming apart. Humans are not in control of the world we live in. We are not in charge.” [Emphasis mine.]
[Peacock, Doug. Was It Worth It? (p. 277). Patagonia. Kindle Edition.]

On his thoughts about climate change:
–“We have not told ourselves the truth. Because it was everyone’s job, it was no one’s job.”
–“There is so much beauty in the world; all we have to do is stick around to see it. For a father who loves the Earth and finds joy in defending wild landscapes, considering our demise as a species is not a pleasant exercise. But we need to see the truth, the raw, unvarnished truth. Science and journalism water down the severity of a changing climate and pull their punches. When we try to extract the most credible science from each, we find much of it filtered through caution and timidity. There are semantic arguments that optimism and hope will color a rosier world, but how we feel about it does not change that unpolished truth. What about temperatures too hot for life on Earth? Or habitats too impaired for survival?”
–“‘That which evolves does not persist without the conditions of its genesis’ is a sentence I’ve found myself repeating monotonously throughout the decades.” [Peacock, Doug. Was It Worth It? (p. 279). Patagonia. Kindle Edition.]

Considering the current administration’s push to expand development, mining, and deforestation, as well as its efforts to push human beings further into the unspoiled natural world, it makes me ponder why the destructive lies about climate change continue to lead us to destroy the very place we live today. Will the ones who care about the future be able to stop the greed and destruction? Will this current legacy be passed on to the next generation, or can the young ones stop it? Something to think about.

Finally, Peacock stated that we need to “peer into the abyss” and think about how we behave.
“There is great joy in doing the toil of the world, fighting for wild causes, saving pieces of the magnificent natural world. There’s plenty of work; do your job with decency and an open heart. Love your brothers and sisters in all actions, in all relationships. Speak the truth. Extend your innate empathy to distant tribes and strange animals. Arm yourself with friendship and love the Earth.” [Peacock, Doug. Was It Worth It? (p. 281). Patagonia. Kindle Edition.]

So, as we go about our daily existence, let’s all take a moment to consider what is happening to the planet. Let’s pull out those eco-warrior people that we were in the past and stop being complacent. Stand up to the farmers and ranchers, as well as the developers, and bring back the “Just Say No!” slogan and apply it to insane growth and expansion into our wildest areas. If you have funds, start buying up land to save it from development and put it in a trust for all future generations, just like Peacock’s buddies have done. Ensure that future generations understand that the land held in trust by your family should never be developed. Clean up the drilling sites to stop methane leakage. And keep those crazy, burping, and farting cows off of those lands! There are better ways to raise these animals, resulting in significantly reduced methane release. There are better ways, people! Just write your congressmen and women to make a change! Recognize that we can change if we desire it. Future generations will love and remember you if you fight the good fight.

Enough said. I love you all and will continue to ask you to step up every day that I am here on this planet. Enjoy your weekend!

When We Become Too Comfortable

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Denver voters voted for Propositions LL and MM to fund healthy meals for all children in their schools. Those who opposed Proposition MM—the tax on incomes higher than $200,000.00—had incomes higher than $200,000.00! Wow! However, all the little people stood up and voted in favor of this measure. They know what’s important.

Georgia voters approved a measure to increase exemptions for seniors on school funding, which is expected to cause a deficit in the public school system. I understand that many seniors suffer, but those with more financial means should pay their fair share to help the younger generations. The “I got mine, the hell with the rest of the world” ideology has to stop now. We must become the person our ancestors wanted us to be.

As a senior, I understand that money can be tight, but I believe in paying my fair share of taxes to help fund public schools and care for future generations. And people with more means should also pay their fair share.  Without accessible education and healthy meal programs, we have doomed our future leaders and given power to the multi-billionaires. (Sound familiar?)

When we start to make money, and some of us have done very well, we forget how we got there. Our education was important and helped create healthy and successful people in most of us. Some of us entrepreneurs have amassed a significant amount of wealth over the years, and we’ve lost touch with the humble person who started out with less. I never made it into the $200,000.00 income crowd, but I shared what I had with those who needed it more than I did. I still do that today and have increased my sharing amounts.

So I am asking all of you to adjust your comfort zone. I am asking all of you to go beyond selfishness and consumerism. Consider taking one less vacation, not buying the latest and greatest iPhone, and save a little money to donate to a cause that helps your local schools and food banks. ALL children deserve an education, and teachers deserve to be treated with respect. That’s all I am asking of each of you. YOU made these children, and you also have neighbors who have children. Treat all of the children and families right, and they will honor you when they take over the world!

Colorado Gives Day is coming up on December 9th. Consider giving more than you did last year. Enough said.

I love you all on this windy, warm day. Hope for rain or snow!

Thank You, America!

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Thank you, America, for standing up and voting yesterday, for people who are FOR THE PEOPLE. We have spoken up, and now others are listening. We now have hope that the people who have faithfully supported that terrible person in power will listen to us and consider the people they are supposed to represent, rather than just the man and his party who hold the reins at the moment. We hope that they will start to think for themselves and not be afraid of him and the crazies out there.

Growing up in a time when women and minorities were treated so badly has given me a deep understanding of people like you know who really are inside. They have no empathy for those in need, only for those who will bow down to him and kiss the ring. I am sad that so many of us don’t understand what a true and progressive democracy really entails. I am sad that we don’t see how people are suffering, and even that some of those people don’t believe he is bad for them. My only hope is that we will continue to strive into the next year to vote for people who will get all of government on track. My hope is that we will survive and learn to support each other.

Michelle Obama’s comments on The Late Show last night hit home as to why I am at a loss like her, why we are allowing this bully to continue. Her conversation with Colbert put it succinctly about what is going on with the demolition of the East Wing—our heritage, and I emphasize ‘our’ as in the people’s heritage, not the one living there at the present moment.

She said:
“People have asked me how I felt about the move.” “What I will remind people is that the house is not our house,” Obama said.
“We never viewed it as our house. We were there for a time. We had a job to do,” the former first lady said.
“We always felt it was the people’s house.”
“And yes, every family, every administration, has a right and a duty to maintain the house, make investments and improvements. And there are plenty of things that needed fixing there,” she told Colbert.
“But the thing — it makes me confused. I am confused by what are our norms. What are our standards? What are our traditions?” Obama said.
During President Obama’s time in office from 2009-17, Michelle Obama said, there were “a whole standard of norms and rules that we follow to a T, that we painstakingly tried to uphold, because it was bigger than us.”
The country, she said, must “decide what rules are we following and who is to abide by them, and who isn’t.”
During her “Late Show” interview, when Colbert mentioned the East Wing, Obama quipped, “Remember that?”
Obama described the East Wing, built in 1942 during Franklin D. Roosevelt’s presidency and which provided space for the first lady’s staff as well as other offices, as “where life happened [emphasis mine].”
“The West Wing was work — sometimes it was sadness, it was problems. It was the guts of the White House,” Obama, author of the new book “The Look,” said.
“The East Wing was where you felt light.”

Michelle Obama on East Wing demolition: ‘We always felt it was the people’s house’

Her thoughts about the East wing being a place where you can be light bring back the memories of a woman in office who cares about her children, about others of every color, and a sense of family we all strive to have. As I reflect on what is going on in this administration, I still have hope that idiot in office will forego his ego and think about what he has done to all the people as a nation, especially those who are the caretakers and the caregivers, and don’t have the power that money brings to them—those everyday people like me that cares about the state of the world. I hope that we are finally considering how to persuade both parties to do what is right and take care of the people they represent.

These last two months have been about reflection, writing for the greater good, finishing up my books and preparing for publication (SOON!), and trying to give back in a way that I know how. Taking a break from the daily sadness has made me realize that I still need to have my say; otherwise, it stews in my head, and I can’t move on. Others don’t always like what I have to say, but all I ask of each and every one of you is to work hard to bring back common decency to those who are being affected by someone who doesn’t obey the rules. As a people of these United States, we generally obey the rules, so why can’t we expect those in power to do the same? Why can’t we expect those in power to be held accountable for their actions? Enough said for today.

I love you all, and I’ll always keep fighting the good fight. I hope you do the same!

Environment Colorado

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CHECK THIS OUT AND PLEASE PARTICIPATE!
Thank you for signing our petition.

You see, our strategy is based on a simple but powerful idea: Each new person who joins our call to help save the bees from toxic pesticides makes it more likely decision-makers will do the right thing.

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Animals need room to roam, but development has too often divided and fragmented their habitats. This contributes to the dramatic wildlife population declines in the U.S. But it doesn’t have to be this way. The bipartisan Wildlife Movement Through Partnerships Act of 2025 will help ensure that wildlife across the country has the necessary space to thrive. 

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Sincerely,
Ellen Montgomery
On behalf of Environment Colorado