Tag Archives: mental-health

Celebrate and Change with Me!

Posted on by
Reply

Or: Half-Way Mark for 365 Days of Kindness Blogs
Today marks the 182nd post or the half-way mark of my endeavor to enlighten, entertain, and encourage people to keep on living life to the fullest and doing great things. Although there were a few days and weeks where I skipped posting, negating the promise to write every day, I must humbly admit that that was me being me, promising something that is often a huge grand gesture, yet, like life, is hard to deliver. But I am persevering through all the ups and downs of my life with everyone else, and continuing to do my part the best way I know how. So it may take more than a few days after that original 365-day mark (November 2024), but I hope you keep reading and sending out good vibes, love and happiness after my messages come to you unbidden.

Re-reading The Monkey Wrench Gang once again helps me understand how the cyclical thoughts on progress got us where we are today. We want convenience to get to places where we shouldn’t be going. And the big money corporations and their CEOs want to continue to get richer so they pretend that they are doing things for the public (destroying the western lands, like building roads and dams, drilling, mining, fracking, ad nauseum) making life better for us, more convenient for us, all the while hurting the earth and the environment and all of us who live in it. After all, the ads always paint a rosy picture, right? And of course we should believe those, right?

Seldom Seen Smith was right: “The river, the canyon, the desert world was always changing, from moment to moment, from miracle to miracle, within the firm reality of mother earth. River, rock, sun, blood, hunger, wings, joy—this is the real….All the rest is androgynous theosophy. All the rest is transcendental transvestite transactional scientology or whatever the fad of the day, the vogue of the week.” [Abbey, Edward. The Monkey Wrench Gang (p. 61). RosettaBooks. Kindle Edition.]

We all want the adventures from our past but in a more convenient, easier way. After all, we are getting older and can’t do those hikes like we used to. We embrace those conveniences at the detriment of those beautiful areas. But we also deny how much our climate is changing and what havoc is wreaked upon all of us. Perhaps it is just too big a problem not one for immediate resolution and that breaks us. So many of us ignore what is happening, and yet many of us are stepping up to the task. We know we can’t fix everything, but we are trying to do the best we can in our smaller environments. Every day I am thankful for all of my adventures in my younger years and what I saw. But I am also thankful for the new inventions in gear, such as better equipment, less plastic, and better shoes and backpacks for the young ones to take those adventures. We can’t give up on the new inventions, yet we have to come up with solutions to stop destroying the land for profit.

Monkey wrenching in the oldest of ideologies doesn’t work the way we think it should. Perhaps we should think of new ways to change progress, maybe purchasing lands (including the mineral rights, if possible) to protect them from the marauders. Smarter people than me are making this happen in many states. It is my hope that this way of thinking will be the new tool to protect our children and grandchildren in the future.

So my thoughts for today are these: Keep picking up trash and plastics no matter where you are and recycle, reuse, etc. You know the drill. Stop using plastics in your home. Go electric or maybe hybrid in your vehicles (I know I am in a few years!) Eat less beef (I love it and I know we are in beef country, but come on!) And grow some wonderful food items in your gardens to feed your family and others!) Stop listening to advertisements. If we can start these practices, thinking before doing, and making changes in our lives, the movement will grow and change will happen.

Keep writing your congressmen to stop granting rights to those in big oil and gas, big mining, big, well everything. Ask your congressmen to stop taking money from these corporations in order to stay in office. I know that is a hard one and many people don’t think like me, but that’s the only way we are going to stop it. Support those who support us. I know we won’t change everything, and I know we’ve heard it before, but we can keep the conversation going. At least our tiny piece of the world will be cleaner. Thank you for listening and I look forward to better times!

Love to all tonight.

END OF TRUTH AND REAL NEWS AS WE KNOW IT

Posted on by
Reply

Or: We Can’t Give Up!
So now we are silencing our comedians for making fun of you know who and his ilk who are making a mockery of our government. It’s a sad day for America when large corporations are silencing the last vestiges of sanity and news reporting and giving money to those in power. When is it going to stop? It’s a sad day when we allow these people control our world.

On Colbert’s show Wednesday night (7/16), his monologue was a bit scathing about the parent company selling out because they wanted CBS to be sold to Skydance and you know who’s billionaires didn’t like what they were hearing. They wanted to make a lot of money so they paid the orange one off. Last night, Colbert announced not only were they getting rid of him, but they were also cancelling The Late Night Show for good. The last show will be in May 2026 after 33 years on air. And of course, the owners said it had nothing to do with politics and was purely a financial decision. Really? Do you think the public believes you? There are many articles posted on this subject and it has made me realize that I no longer want to support CBS. As government slowly demolishes our right to know, our right to the truth, I hope we are all thinking about the long-term consequences. Colbert-Late Night Show Cancelled

But that’s not the only thing I wanted to say today. Colbert’s guest on Wednesday was Dr. Francis Collins, former director of NIH (National Institute of Health), an amazing and renown scientist. After the current regime gutted funding and the ability to conduct research, Dr. Collins retired from office. He stated that over 2500 projects were stopped. They were told to shut down any further critical research on Vaccines, Cancer, Alzheimer’s, Covid and even Aids which they were making great strides in creating cures and advances for our health care. Now the science has stopped and we will no longer have those medical miracles at our fingertips.

Dr. Collins also stated that since our brilliant young scientists are being laid off and can’t get jobs here, they are leaving to go to countries where they can, such as Australia, Europe, and China. He stated we will start to see the effects of this brain drain soon. We are allowing this to happen. I don’t blame these young people. They want to learn and discover new cures and aren’t able to do this here. Perhaps if we get a sane and rational person back in office next time, they will come back. But it will take years to catch up to the progress we made in the past. Contrary to popular belief, it takes time to study and research cures.

Finally, Dr. Collins told Colbert that right now two-thirds of the country are what he calls the exhausted middle because of the controversy and outrage Olympics happening in our world right now. He believes that this has happened because of these deficits:

Truth deficit (no penalties for lying)
Trust deficit (we have stopped trusting each other)
Civility deficit (we are just being really mean to each other)
Compassion deficit (he gave an example of the USAID cuts and how people are suffering world-wide; over 90,000 children have died unnecessarily)
He believes that we, the exhausted ones, have to get all of this back. We are the ones who can make change happen.

I know we are all tired, but we can’t give up. We can’t stop believing in each other AND the science (and scientists) behind the advances to create a better world. We must continue to write to our representatives who are supporting this slippery slope slide (say that mouthful out loud!) into fascism. We must ask them to not take money from those billionaires who support this nonsense because these people are not helping to make a better world for all. Those billionaires seek power and want to buy your representatives. Those billionaires are only thinking about themselves and their money. I am starting to worry that censorship will not be far behind these blatant acts of our cancel culture.

So keep up the protests. Don’t give up even though you are exhausted. Don’t give up on learning and loving all people. Check out Dr. Collins’ book: The Road to Wisdom. I ordered it on Kindle today. It is going to be very interesting read.

I love you all, and hope you continue to do good things and support those in need every day you live on this smoke-filled planet!

Who Will Be There for You?

Posted on by
Reply

I have been contemplating how I want to be remembered and who I want to have around me, especially when it’s time to dance off this plane of existence. My writing has always been one of a mixture of fact and fiction and my past frequently shows up in the characters I’ve written about. I don’t always reveal my darkest moments, and I am okay with that. I want to be remembered as one who loves life and appreciates others for who they are. I don’t want to dwell on past realities or relationships that brought me down. I want to celebrate the love I have been given over these last 25+ years. I hope that my family feels the same. I constantly search for what Wallace Stegner called a usable past that I can employ in my characters and reveal a little of myself to strangers. There are so many things that I want my family and friends to remember about me that are positive.

I wish that I had been more of a documentarian like Edward Abbey and kept my journals full. I wrote during my travels, but over the last few years, I became more sedentary and didn’t keep up. I began writing sort of a prequel about my beloved Caitlin, which came from notes over the past 50 or more decades. As I go through the notes, there are so many things that I wished I had fleshed out when I was living them. But that is the beauty of storytelling I suppose. Write what you know, and remember, and the story will follow.

I suppose pictures will have to be good enough for my future generations. As they fade, we are endeavoring to digitize those old Polaroids and other camera photos. But one thing I’d like to share with you is to keep a journal on hand at all times. Document your adventures because places you’ve cherished may not be there when your family travels to them.

I loved the fact that Wallace Stegner had a legacy, to-do list on his desk when he died and it was later published. He reminded me that while I am on this earth, there is still so much work to be done. I have completed many to-do lists and put them on my desktop of my computer, both short and long-term projects. I want to begin to add writing lists to this, for people and places I want to research and learn about.

But who will be there for you through your failing brain, through sickness, through general aging? Decide who is most important and ask them to be there as you will be there for them. Even if you don’t leave a large legacy, be there for the ones you care about the most, a family member, a loving spouse, or a best friend. My spouse is my both my spouse and best friend. I hope that he will be there for me as I will be there for him.

Finally, ever think about what you want to put out there at the end of life? As a writer I think it’s important to create your own obituary ahead of time. Find a picture you love, and save it on a thumb drive somewhere. Put it in an envelope and give it to each other. You’ve lived a wonderful life so why not have your family celebrate it the way you want them to?

So after walking around the house for 10 minutes looking for your glasses so you can finish your epic novel, and after finding them on the top of your head, rejoice in the fact that you are still here. Embrace the knowledge that your loved ones still love you, and that your words may not be read by everyone, but that they have been immortalized in print. Know that you have left a tiny footprint on this earth and those that love you will still remember your impact on their lives, whether good or bad, mad, or sad, cursed, or beloved. Hope for happiness during the life you still have and wish for happiness for you loved ones in the future. Acknowledge (and write it down) that special someone to watch over you. Someone to Watch Over Me

Love to all on this dark and stormy night! Keep enjoying the zucchini! Here is a wonderful recipe I just tried! Very delicious! Stanley Tucci’s Zucchini and Potato Muffins

Dancing in the Moonlight

Posted on by
Reply

Or: Do You Remember Where You Were in June 1973?
Or: Do You Remember When You Were 18?
Or: Do You Remember When You Believed You Had the World at Your Fingertips?

And here I am, 50+ years later still dancing, but with many harsh realities coming at me every day that I am alive. I just read about this, but it happened a while ago. It is still noteworthy to mention again. A bunch of so-called righteous moms checked out all of a San Diego library’s featured LBGTQ+ books and refused to bring them back unless the library took them off the shelf. Okay, so now I must rant a little. Here is what I am saying to you (I wish it could be directly to your face): First, what gives you the right to censure every other human being that uses that public library? Secondly, why are you soooooooooo ignorant? Thirdly, this worked against you, because when the public heard about your little stunt, they went out and purchased all of those books and gave them to the library, AND raised and donated $15,000.00 for the library. Then…. the City of San Diego matched that donation so now they had $30,000.00 total to buy many more wonderful books! So your little stunt backfired! Also, if I was the librarian, I would have sent you a big whopping bill!

All I’m saying to you people who think you know best for EVERYONE, just let it go. There are many other people in the world who have different opinions and lifestyles from you. You cannot dictate what others think or do. It has never worked in our society. We worked hard to be different and more tolerant of all people. I am still amazed there are so many small-minded people in the world. You should be striving to change every day that you live and let others live their lives. Don’t dictate demands on others who don’t agree with you. Don’t be afraid of DIFFERENT even if it is within your own family. They are still your siblings and children. They love you and you should absolutely and unconditionally love them back. Isn’t that what we fought for? To be a nation different from Europe? Everyone who came here in the past have their own ways of thinking. I don’t agree with all of them, but that doesn’t make me want to censure them. Conversations don’t have to be about your small-minded ways of thinking. Embrace everyone and Lighten Up!

So as we face and accept our aging, we can still believe that we all have the world at our fingertips. We can still believe that we all have choices and accept that we are all wonderful beings and choose love, not hate. And, after we’ve faced the heat of the day, we can just wait a little while for nightfall and thank the universe that we are still alive. We can then go outside and water the tomatoes, say hello to the bugs, the bats eating the bugs, nightfall, and embrace the moon! Do a little dance, make a little love, and get down tonight (KC and the Sunshine Band).

“We like our fun and we never fight
You can’t dance and stay uptight
It’s a supernatural delight
Everybody was dancing in the moonlight….”
Dancing in the Moonlight
King Harvest – Original (Although Toploader does a good job!)

I love you all and wish some of you would just grow up into loving humans!

The Heat is On

Posted on by
Reply

As I ponder the many things I can do inside because of the heat I return to my writing once again and try and capture the thread that will finish the book. But, alas, my mind wanders, there are loads of inside chores to complete and I return to the blog, if only to get some writing in today.

Summer Solstice is upon us and I want to return to a simpler time when I danced with the goddess on the longest day of the year with my fellow merrymakers in sacred spaces. I once believed that I was on the right path to enlightenment and the world’s woes were slowly being resolved. I once embraced the path that we as a people of this great nation believed and cared for each other. The police I knew were starting to come around and be the friendly neighborhood protectors instead of using evil [gestapo] tactics. They were proud to be a part of the neighborhood. People weren’t shooting each other in my neighborhood. Neighbors left their doors open, had block parties and shared beautiful food and music without interference from the evil ICE folks, or local police using military tactics for no reason. I want to return to hearing that violent crime is down. Maybe it was all an illusion, but I was proud to be a part of that illusion of the world.

Today, things are rapidly deteriorating to fear tactics and hating BIPOC [i.e., the brown people or anyone who doesn’t look exactly like you]. I still don’t understand how some people can embrace this in their lives. I want those people to wake up and fight back no matter what. I want people to take away all the guns from those that are insanely violent and hurt those who are trying to do the right thing. And I want to return to the belief that we must allow justice to take place and punish those in the wrong (you know who I am talking about). I want that weird secret police to go away and stop harassing those who believe in the democratic process and are just doing the right thing within their jobs and the courts. I want to believe that we can return to finding enlightenment within our lives without worrying about be accosted, or even worse, shot.

So, enjoy the peaceful moments today. Go inside and leave off the TV and phone. Write to your heart’s content your thoughts and musings in your beautiful journals (or laptops!). Read a good book. Work on a puzzle with your family or play a game. And, put on some 80’s tunes (Glen Frey) and get away from it all for a little while.
The Heat is On

I love you all and hope only great things happen to you!

Birthdays and Worry

Posted on by
Reply

Is it wrong to worry about the future when you are older than most people?
Is it wrong to worry about your child’s future so much that you make yourself sick?
Is it wrong to question why people are the way they are when they support an idiot in office with no regard to their families or other families?
Why are we where we are?
Why are we shooting people who are trying to do the right thing?
Why are people in power afraid to do the right thing?
STAND UP!

Today is my birthday and I am pondering the state of the union and the world as we know it. Each year that I am alive, I have seen the good and the bad of administrations in power and it seems that this one is really bad. I am amazed at the people who are turning out in droves to protest and feel good that there are so many of us who care about what is going on. I am also amazed at those in power who aren’t marching with us, who think that this king is right and just and they refuse to depose him. He should not be the one leading the country. What will it take to bring about change for the better?

Today I am asking everyone that have supported this administration to reflect on who you voted for. I am begging you to ask good questions of your representatives why they are letting all of this nonsense happen. I am asking the red states to turn a little more purple and vote out those who support him. I am asking everyone to be brave and send out love to those who are being oppressed. I am asking everyone to lose their prejudices and accept everyone the way they are. Don’t kick out those in the military who are different than you (you know who I’m talking about). They signed up to do a job to support their country, just like you and your children did when wars were looming (or not). They wanted to do their duty to keep democracy alive. I am begging you to stop ignoring your children if they tell you they are different that what you expect. Have an open and honest conversation with them. Accept them the way they are. Embrace their differences with pride. You raised them to be independent. They may not be the same as you and you need to be okay with that. Love them for who they are.

And finally, don’t be hateful to anyone who doesn’t look like you. They have a right to be on this earth just like you. And many of them were in this country long before your family came here. RISE UP and make a difference before it’s too late. Move beyond your small plane of existence and see the world in a multi-colored perspective. Thank you.
RISE UP

Love vibes to all on this fantastic summer day.

I Yam What I Yam

Posted on by
Reply

Or: You Cannot Keep Ignoring the Truth
Popeye said it so succinctly that we are who we are no matter what others think of us. With all the Pride parades and parties coming up, I want to return to a subject that the rednecks (male and female alike) of the world have latched onto because of that guy in office. Why are you so worried about others whose identity doesn’t match up to what your expectations are? Why are you afraid that others who can be incredible and yet different from your perception of reality?

And you women out there who are so loud and obnoxious and sooooo terribly wrong in these matters, ask yourself: Why do you fall into line because a ridiculous man is telling you what you think and what you should do? Are you that privileged that you don’t see the pain of others when you belittle those who are unique in their own ways? Why are you threatened by this?

Blaming DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) on everything that is happening is just wrong. We had come a long way before the buffoon started telling us what to think. Women, get it together and change this! Teach your children (especially your male children) to respect women and diverse people. Stop agreeing with this nonsense and support your community – those who are alike and different that you. DEI isn’t a bad word. It promotes:

  • Educator Growth: Professional Development, Training, Hiring Practices.
  • Classroom and Climate: Culturally Responsive and Inclusive Practices and Curriculum.
  • Student Belonging: Identity, Empathy, Inclusion.
  • Community Cohesion: Parent/Guardian Education and Involvement, Town Partnerships.

I grew up in an era where if you weren’t a white Anglo-Saxon male, your voice meant nothing. Have we completely returned to this way of thinking? And, if so Why? Everyone is unique and have made it so far in this world. Hating someone for being of a different race, a different gender, for what they believe, or even how they dress and identify is just wrong. We have to return to loving kindness for all and if that is what it means to be woke, then count me in!

“Everyone deserves to live free from hate, fear, and violence. We cannot free ourselves from hate if we don’t identify and acknowledge it when it happens. What is typically included in ongoing reporting is just as important as what is left out – the voices of individuals who experienced incidents of hate.” AND:
“Today’s political climate is highly charged. From white supremacist and anti-government movements coalescing and moving more into the political mainstream, to conspiracy theories circulating online, to the amplification of hate by public officials. We refuse to let the loud volume of a few define us.” https://civilrights.org/value/fighting-hate-bias/#

For more information on this organization and what else you can do see:
https://civilrights.org/blog/

So all I am saying is stop the patter of malcontent and learn to accept that not everyone is like you. Embrace all those who differ from you, even if you don’t always agree with them. Make life a little easier for yourself if you choose your battles and words with others.

Get outside, enjoy the beautiful days, and have a heart full of love tonight! Love to all who are trying to do their part every day they live!

Every Wrinkle Tells a Story

Posted on by
Reply

Or: Love and Respect through the Ages
WRINKLE: A small furrow, ridge, or crease on a normally smooth surface, caused by crumpling, folding, or shrinking; A line or crease in the skin, as from age; a clever trick, method, or device, especially one that is new and different;
a problem or imperfection; a fault
WRINKLY: adjective wrinkly; comparative adjective wrinklier; superlative adjective: wrinkliest-having many lines or folds.
Urban dictionary: A cute old person

So I haven’t posted since Mother’s Day and life has once again gotten in the way of my pursuit for harmony and peace. I broke my rib and it was a road that I had not wanted to take, and a painful one to say the least. I still hate emergency rooms and hospitals in general, and hope to never go back! Needless to say, the old part of me felt it. Although I am recuperating fast, I have learned something about paying attention to the little things in life, such as not carrying a ton of things in my hands while walking down the stairs! Knees don’t always work the way we want them to. From now on, one hand on the rail at all times. You don’t realize how much you must pay attention to little things as you age in order to live another day.

Having said all that, I feel like I am slowly accepting help when I need help, though I grit my teeth and chastise myself for putting myself into that situation. I appreciate my spouse, and forgive all his grumblings. I hope he understands everything that I do all the time during the day now that he has had to do it. I hope he appreciates me as much as I appreciate him every day.

He was a life saver in my grand scheme of the garden. This weekend, we weeded (thistle is my nemesis!), planted flowers and bushes, and planted some of the vegetables, except for the tomatoes. They are still in pots. The rain has been both wonderful and crazy. I love the green, but not the weeds! The raised beds have been a fantastic addition since I don’t bend as well right now. We’ll see what comes up!

I have been thinking about all the wrinkles that have come up in my life, especially since I now know that I am not invincible (I KNOW! Harsh reality sets in permanently!) Every day I try to have a positive attitude about these life lessons. I look at my physical wrinkles as an accomplishment, not one that needs to be faded away with all the expensive cremes from late night advertisements. I look at each one with love, and thank them for allowing me to be here a little longer on this plane of existence.

Wrinkles in life happen and that makes us grow. Sometimes we take a new direction each time there is a wrinkle in the road, and sometimes it is a better path. And sometimes we re-live our mistakes in our heads too many times and forget to take the new fork in the road. When we can resolve a current problem, we can move forward to the next phase in our life and accept that things are always changing. We have to drive around and as we process old blockages, we move forward.

If we can focus on the good even in the overwhelming chatter of the bad things out in the world, we can finish our work – the work that we were put on this earth to do. If the negativity begins to give you more wrinkles, try and take a step back and fix the problem that is disrupting your journey.

Try to read more about love and acceptance and stop blaming everyone else. Try to have a perspective that cares about the world, and all of its people. Do something wonderful each day, no matter how small the task is. Learn to appreciate your wrinkles, and how you got them. Learn how to learn something new every day that you live. Finish one task at a time and move on to the next. Before you know it, you will have lived a wonderful life and no one can take that away from you. Love who you are, wrinkles and all.

I send out love and positivity tonight to everyone!

Maturity and Justice

Posted on by
Reply

I am re-reading How to Raise a Citizen by Dr. Lindsey Cormack because there is so much packed into this little book regarding what we don’t know about our political system, and why we haven’t passed on this knowledge to our children. This should be an awakening to what is happening right now in our country. It should be a part of your parental handbook for life’s simple responsibilities. We cannot buy into the old “we don’t talk about politics because it is not unpleasant or it’s not polite.” That is old and outdated thinking. We cannot protect our children from being upset, especially if they don’t understand how the world works at a younger age. There are levels of teachings that is uncomfortable, but we as parents must embrace the uncomfortable conversations. Sometimes, that is what makes the children as well as their adult parents grow. We have to help them understand how the world can be harsh and how politicians aren’t representing us, but couching the conversation in a no nonsense, calm manner. When we are angry about what is going on, we pass that anger onto the children and that is why they don’t want to participate. It’s okay to talk about hard things in a calm manner. It’s okay for them to have a different opinion from you if they have the facts to back it up. Children (and adults) need to understand how to live in a society that is democratic and fair to all people without fear rearing its ugly head in the conversation.

And here are a few more points on creating a handbook for your children before they become an adult:
First, start teaching your children at an early age on what is important for them to survive on a daily basis when they become an adult. It should include the knowledge of living on their own as a new adult. When they go out in the world, they should understand what the four top items in their budget are:

  1. Shelter
  2. Heat
  3. Water
  4. Food

IN THAT ORDER BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE.
A new adult should have a basic understanding of how things work in the world, like, oh, let’s say remembering to pay their bills on time. New adults should understand a basic contract, and that they are agreeing to pay the rent or mortgage first, as well as the items that come with this agreement, such as the heat and water bill, before spending money on anything else. And they should be a polite human being when they are on the phone with people who are trying to help them.

It is my hope that parents are creating their own handbooks for their children before pushing them out of the nest. It is my hope that the people I talk to every day who are rude, are those examples of humanity that didn’t listen to the good advice their parents gave them. And finally, it is my hope that parents have taken measures to help their children understand how to live their best life by taking care of themselves and others who need them, and creating a better society that believes in democracy and rights and fairness for all people.

While Democracy is slowly being abolished and fascism is taking its place in this current era, we as parents as well as the new adults, should focus on fighting the good fight, not bickering over tiny, stupid things. Place your anger where it belongs. Ask yourself and your friends why they believe in things that aren’t true. Ask your children good questions. Give them a chance to ask you good questions and seek answers that make sense, even if you are uncomfortable.

Ask your senators and representatives why they are not stepping up to support the people. Do our members of congress who are bowing to that guy in office know something that we don’t? Do they know that they are just going to stay in power when the next election comes around? Do they know that we may not even have an election so that’s why they aren’t worried? I urge you to watch the 5/6/25 episode of the Late Show with Stephen Colbert and what guest Rachel Maddow talked about regarding this subject. She had some amazing insight into what is going on out there and how the American people are wholeheartedly protesting and trying to bring about change to what has been happening.

We as a people cannot lie down and take it. We have to continue the good fight against what is happening. We have to focus our anger and frustration into a cause that defeats those who don’t care what is happening in Congress. We have to turn over the vote on everyone who is not doing their job to protect the rights of the American people.

So, take a moment and think before you harass your lowly government workers. Take a moment to look at the bigger picture and fight the fight that needs fighting! We can change the world if we’re all in this together! Thank you for listening.

So, get serious with what needs getting serious about, then you can get silly and sing a happy song! Let’s Go Fly a Kite!

I love you all tonight, even you grumpy ones!

Expectations and Control

Posted on by
Reply

I have been pondering of late why we are so stressed out that we can’t even think and do the simplest of tasks. I think the negative energy surrounding us is so strong that we feel like we are out of control of our everyday lives. We cope by wanting to place our burden onto someone else for a moment. We don’t want to resolve our own problems yet we get upset with others when we put it on them and it doesn’t turn out the way we think it should. Our cognitive dissonance kicks in. Our mind spirals out of control. We are thinking that we both love the person trying to help us, and hate them for coming up with a solution at the same time. It is hard to understand that we are thankful that they tried to help us, but hate them because it wasn’t the solution we were hoping or looking for to solve the problem, and, as a result, we get angry and disappointed.

Our expectations of everything getting better, when a lot of things are getting worse, make us on edge and we don’t know what to expect. And it doesn’t help that the media is keeping it out there. We start to hate the people and events that don’t fit into our world, and start agreeing with the most egregious acts. We want to believe that everything is wonderful for us and all that is out there is affecting everyone else, not us. Well, I’m here to tell you, bad things are happening to EVERYONE. It’s how we deal with our daily lives and expectations that makes us survive in an unpleasant situation. It’s how we deal with others and treat them that makes us human beings and members of a society that only we can make better.

So here is my thought for today. Things in your bubble can be better if you treat others the way you want to be treated. Things in your bubble will get better if you take a break from the doomsday news and greet someone with love and kindness each day. Things in your bubble will get better if you believe you are in control of your own bubble and expect greatness of yourself. Be brave!

Finally, here are a few things I want to pass on to you after this crazy week I had:

  • I know you’re busy, but take some time to read the instructions. Find out why something isn’t working to your satisfaction.
  • Don’t blame the person on the phone.
  • You are expected to be an adult and take responsibility for researching the problem. The person you have called to fix a problem can help you, but it is ultimately your responsibility to understand why the problem exists and how to fix it in the future.
  • Slow down and take a breath before speaking.
  • Follow along when someone is trying to tell you something.
  • Contrary to popular belief the world doesn’t revolve around you!
  • We can get through it together. We all have to work together to fix any problem. It will take time. And remember, there is only so much time in a workday. There is never enough workers, and there are lots of jobs to do in a day!

Finally, I know I am prone to this, but I believe that we cannot isolate ourselves in a cocoon while all this is going on. Sure, we can turn off the news, but the buzz will always be around us. So here’s a thought: Take one hour for yourself, and take one hour for someone else each day that you live on this plane of existence.
For yourself, take a walk with your dog, or just by yourself. Go out and weed (I know! I know! But it really is fulfilling!) In a few weeks, plant your garden. Go swim and sing in the lap lane! Put your headphones on and get on the treadmill! Watch the movie A Complete Unknown and be taken back in time.

For others, walk and talk with them and listen to what they have to say. Be there in person and on the phone and in the present moment to help someone solve a problem. Try not to get frustrated with them because they are frustrated. And, read a wonderful tale of love and triumph. Purchase and read How We Learn to Be Brave by Mariann Edgar Budde and “…be responsible for your rose [from Le Petit Prince]…[and] “…Be a person upon whom others [can] depend and relish the days when nothing important seems to be happening….”

I love you all and I trying to live in the present moment every day even when it is hard. I ask that you to do the same!

May the 4th be with you!!!